How to Moderate Alcohol: 50 Tips, Tools, and Prompts for Drinking Less

Gain tools for cutting back on alcohol that address the many reasons we drink to begin with.

Even with all the clarity and willpower in the world, we can still feel at a complete loss when faced with the question of how to cut back on drinking. Growing up, many of us only learned about the harms of drug and alcohol use, and were sent into the world armed with the equivalent of a flimsy plastic sword: Just say no.

In reality, developing a healthy relationship to alcohol involves so much more than willpower. Motivation, awareness, insight, planning, learning, and emotional regulation are all critical parts of the process. The below tips, tools, and writing prompts may not be a silver bullet to binge or chronic drinking, but hopefully they give you a few ways to strengthen these other skills.

And one necessary disclaimer: These tools are intended to provide you with information, not medical advice. Alcohol withdrawals can pose significant—and, in some cases, fatal—health risks. Refer to your healthcare provider for guidance on how to safely reduce or quit alcohol.

Establish Motivation

1. The Values of Moderation: Lasting change isn’t just about just doing something different—it’s also about becoming the person you want to be by practicing actions that are aligned with your values. Write down the core values that guide your moderation efforts (e.g., Family, Financial Prosperity, Health, Responsibility, Restraint, etc.), and journal about how moderation and reduction relate to each.

2. Abundance Mindset: The concept of abundance helps us connect to growth and appreciation, as opposed to fearfully focusing on what is missing. Instead of dwelling on moderation as a restrictive practice, reflect on the specific freedoms you actually gain from it (e.g., feeling well, having more time and money, better memory, mental space, etc.).

3. Your Team: Who are the people who will be proud of you for cutting back on alcohol? How would achieving your moderation goals improve these relationships? If you feel that you’re lacking sober community, how can you join or build a group who share in your goals or values of moderation?

4. Letter from a Sober Self: Whether you’ve been alcohol-free for a day, a week, or a month, turn the positives of that experience into a letter that you can return to later, when you need a reminder of your “why.” Why is it important to cut back on alcohol? What feels better when you aren’t drinking or hungover? What are the qualities about your sober self that you and others cherish?

5. The Piggy Bank: Take some time to work out how much money you spend on alcohol each month. Calculate how much you save by eliminating or reducing your alcohol intake, and set that money aside. Watch it grow into savings, or use it on something that helps you connect with joy and relaxation in healthier ways (e.g., Travel, activity memberships, hobby classes, a regular spa day, a nice meal out, etc.).

6. The 7-Day Challenge: If you’re motivated by streaks and brief sprints, set up a 7-day challenge for yourself. You might choose to not drink for the week, set a daily maximum, or aim for a weekly drink total (e.g., 7 drinks or less). If a friend or family member is willing to join you for it, that can provide an extra boost of motivation.

Build Awareness

7. Daily Drink Tracking: Take note of how many drinks you had today on a calendar, in your journal, or through an app. This can help you both in tracking progress and preventing instances of losing count. 

8. Highlight High-Risk Events: On your calendar, use a highlighter on any scheduled events that involve drinking. For each highlighted event, write down a plan for your boundaries and how you’ll keep them (e.g., 2 drink maximum, home by 10pm, choose an accountability partner for the night).

9. Location Triggers: Make a list of all the places you tend to drink, and be as specific as possible (e.g., a restaurant you frequent, a friend’s house, a room in your own house, etc.).

10. The HALT Technique: Before pouring a drink, take a second to check on these four feelings:

H – Hungry A – Angry L – Lonely T – Tired

These are common precursors to drinking, and by identifying any of these four, you may instead choose to respond in a different way first. If hungry, have a snack and chug some water first. Angry? See if a short walk, gratitude practice, or exercise helps. If lonely, try reaching out to a loved one. With fatigue, see if you can allow yourself to relax with a shower, quiet meditation, or some couch time without a drink.

11. Visual Reminders: To interrupt automatic habit responses, try leaving yourself physical reminders near typical drinking triggers to build awareness. Post-it notes, stickers, symbolic objects, or phone reminders set for a certain time can all be helpful tools for creating visual cues.

12. Mindful Drinking: Slow down drinking with a mindfulness exercise using the senses available to you. What does the drink look like and how would you describe it? Is it fizzy and making any sound? How does the glass feel when you touch it? How does the drink smell? How does it taste?

13. Savoring Practice: After having one drink, give yourself time to stop and study how you feel. Oftentimes, there’s a feeling of pleasure, and the brain automatically says, “More of that, please!” Challenge yourself to stop and savor the feelings here without giving into the urge to change, enhance, or prolong the feeling.

Plan

14. Take a “Dry” Day: Choose a day this week to take the day off drinking. Plan stuff to keep yourself busy, or just see if you can enjoy a day of relaxation without alcohol. You can practice scheduling a Dry Day based on convenience, or select a recurring “No Alcohol” day in your weekly routine.

15. Assign Limits: Before you begin drinking, take a moment to set a drink limit with yourself. You might choose a number that you know will allow you to experience some relaxation while also challenging yourself to not need more.

16. The Hangover Zone: On average, how many drinks tend to result in a hangover for you? Keep that number in mind. Remind yourself that as you approach that limit, you’re running the risk of feeling sick, tired, anxious, and/or depressed the next day.

17. Know Your Season: It’s common to have periods of time where you feel freshly aligned with your drinking goals. With time and confidence, attention to boundaries can start to erode. Then, a big slip might catch you off guard. By knowing your “seasons” of stability and slippage, the better you can be prepared to meaningfully renew your commitment to moderation through weekly, monthly, quarterly check-ins with yourself.

Get Alcohol Support

Delay

18. Urge Surfing: When you feel the urge to have a drink, such as when coming home or going out, see if you can delay your first drink by 20 minutes (or however long you feel you can agree to). Turn your attention to another way to unwind or shift your attention to another distracting activity.

19. Alternate In-Between: Add a glass of water, seltzer, or another NA drink in between alcoholic drinks to hydrate, slow down, and stretch things out.

20. It’s 6:00 Somewhere: If you find yourself drinking regularly at a certain time (like right after work at 5:00pm), set your start time a little later, even if just an hour. 

21. First Things First: Whenever you land in the place you normally drink, add a task to do before drinking. If at home, maybe take a shower first, change your clothes, or knock out some chores. If outside of the home, see what tasks you can add before that first drink: Say hi and visit with a friend, take a tour of the place, or engage with another activity that’s available.

Setting Limits & Barriers

22. Drink Tokens: Find some kind of tracking token that you can bring with to wherever you’re drinking, and only bring as many tokens as your personal drink limit. For example: Bracelets, rings, coins, paperclips, etc. Move the token from one hand or pocket to the other (or dispose of them as you use them, if disposable) as they are exchanged for drinks to help you track and stay accountable. 

23. Out of Sight, Out of Mind: Think about all of the different places you see alcohol, and where it’s kept at home. Is it easily visible in your line of sight? For example: Try moving bottles to an area you can’t see (the further and more inconvenient, the better). If at a party, see if you can find a place to hang out that’s far from the booze. At a restaurant, choose a chair that’s facing away from the bar.

24. Leave Your Wallet Behind: If you know it’s tempting to stop by the bar or grocery store while you’re out and about, see if it’s possible to leave your credit card or ID at home.

25. Goal Reflection: Before entering a situation that involves drinking, set a goal number of drinks. Let’s say your goal is to have just one drink while out with your coworkers, but you ended up having five. Afterwards, use curiosity to write down all the pitfalls as well as potential solutions for next time. E.g. “It was hard to stick to just one while out for six hours. Next time, I’d prefer to stay out for just two hours and relax at home afterward.”

Reduction

26. One Less: Think about your drink limit or how many drinks you typically have on a certain day or occasion. Challenge yourself to drink just one less, and notice how that feels both in the moment and the next day.

27. Stock Intentionally: Have a clear idea of your daily drink limit? Stock only that many drinks in your refrigerator. Buy small amounts and resist keeping a surplus at home. If headed to a BYOB event, bring only the amount you intend to drink and try and stick to just that.

28. Dilute and Weaken: Experiment with ways to lessen the relative volume of alcohol in your drink. Add more tonic. Supplement with non-alcoholic spirits. Switch from doubles to singles. Buy a beer with lower ABV.

Crush Cravings

29. Chug Water: Studies suggest that chugging water may help stave off alcohol by reducing ghrelin plasma concentration.

30. Brush Teeth: Brushing away the lingering taste of alcohol can help to remove one more sensory trigger. Plus, you might find alcohol doesn’t taste as good in a fresh, minty mouth.

31. This Will Pass: Cravings are temporary. They may feel intense—even overwhelming. But see what happens when you take a deep breath and remind yourself that this feeling is temporary.

32. Try a TIPP Exercise: TIPP stands for “Temperature, Intense Exercise, Paced Breathing, and Progressive Muscle Relaxation.” These techniques can be used to soothe intense feelings, and may help you ride out the wave of cravings. Take a hot shower, do some jumping jacks, practice box breathing, or listen to a guided PMR video.

Healthier Self-Care

33. Satisfy the Inner Fun-Seeker: Inside all of us is a part that wants to feel joy, excitement, and fun. Alcohol offers a quick, easy source for that, hence why it can feel so difficult to resist when you need some liveliness. Make a list of activities to offer this part instead—things you can do at home, or go out. Watch standup comedy, dance, try a new snack or flavored drink from the store, host a game night, go people-watching, etc.

34. Battery Recharge: While alcohol may provide a temporary feeling of relaxation, it ultimately degrades your figurative battery and leaves you feeling like it's unable to hold a charge. We all need time to relax. See if you can delegate any responsibilities you have and set up time—a day, an hour, or even just 30 minutes if that’s all you have—to exhale into total relaxation. A hot bath, time in nature, spa day, couch time…whatever you need to recharge.

35. Calendar Blocking: Take a look at a week in your calendar, and notice the structure of each day down to the hour. Start to plot when the drinking starts: After work? On weekends? Happy hour? Start to fill those blocks of time in with a healthy diversion like classes, sober game nights, daily walk, or peer support meeting.

36. Resource List: Make a list with the following columns: People, Places, Activities, and Things. Fill the columns with the friends, family, pastimes, places, pets, and anything else that makes you feel connected, joyful, and at ease.

37. Non-Alcoholic Novelties: You don’t have to resign yourself to a life of tap water. Try introducing some novelty into your fridge by trying new beverage substitutes: Seltzers, juices, teas, ginger beers, non-alcoholic beers, mocktails, sparkling water…have fun exploring the grocery store shelves.

Relieve Peer Pressure

38. Accountability Doubling: Is there someone you can partner with to share in moderation goals? It can be helpful to check in periodically with someone, or team up at events involving alcohol—especially if you recognize a tendency to pace with peers (e.g., thoughts like “Well, if they’re having another…”).

39. Find Your Personal “No Thanks”: First of all, you don’t owe anyone an explanation for why you aren’t drinking. Even if someone presses you with a “why not,” it’s perfectly alright to simply say “No thanks.” That being said, it can help to prepare some language that feels authentic to you: “I don’t really feel like drinking today.” “I’m a little tired, I think I’m good.” “I’m trying to get up early tomorrow.” “I’m taking the night off drinking.”

40. Drinking Buddies: Whether it’s a go-to drinking buddy or a stressful person you always feel an urge to drink around (or afterward), make a list of people who you tend to drink or drink more around. This one isn’t about blaming others or deflecting responsibility, but rather to acknowledge that drinking triggers are often social or embedded in specific relationships. Being aware of them can help you better plan your supports and responses in advance.

Listening to Emotions

41. One Minute of Guilt: Although guilt can feel debilitating sometimes, it’s an important emotion. It tells us to self-reflect on our actions and values, and urges us to make changes that better align with those values or the person we hope to be. Set a timer for one minute and tune into this guilt. What is it telling you about what is important to you? What does it wish you did differently? What is one thing—big or small–you can do today to be in greater alignment with your values and goals?

42. Reframe the Shame: Shame may feel useless—but at its core, it’s a survival response. Humans have evolved to rely on other humans, and when we’ve done something we feel might threaten our position of belonging, our instinct is to hide, shrink, or fawn to others. When you notice shame, take a moment to acknowledge the important role it plays in protecting you. Then ask yourself, is this survival response helpful right now, or would you like to respond in a different way to what is happening?

43. Mobilize Through Anger: Anger is an energizing emotion. It’s a signal that says, “Hey, I think something important to you is under threat. Do something!” That’s useful information to have. Where it tends to cause problems is when we act on it before really thinking about it. So, notice the anger and see if you can understand why it’s there. Then, choose to respond to it in a helpful way such as making an action plan for yourself or getting involved in advocacy. If the anger doesn’t feel useful right now, you might try soothing it through breathwork, relaxation, or grounding techniques.

44. Understanding Depression: Depression is an emotion that often sounds like, “It’s hopeless” or “I’m tired of trying.” The mind and body are under-resourced and in a state of energy/effort conservation, which can feel like emptiness, fatigue, or numbness. This feeling can be very complex, but one question you might consider exploring here is, “What do I need that I’m not getting?” Are there any steps you can take to fulfill this need, even in a small way?  

45. Excitement: One of the sneakiest emotional triggers associated with drinking is excitement. Maybe the sun is out, or you’re celebrating something. That excitement combined with the chemical gratification of drinking can feel ridiculously good, and the brain’s reward center turns into Kylo Ren screaming “MORE.” If excitement, celebration, or elation tends to accelerate drinking for you, take some time to prepare your brakes.  

Self-Compassion

46. Learner’s Mind: Like all new skills, alcohol moderation is a practice. Since there’s no such thing as perfection, celebrate progress instead. Use mistakes, slips, and backslides as moments as data to be curious about. Ask yourself, “What was going on that made me want to drink more? What do I to respond next time? What support do I need to help me prioritize and maintain my goals next time?”

47. Compassion Enables Learning: When we talk to ourselves in a way that induces shame, it can put the body into a survival state that makes it difficult for the brain to integrate learning. Talking to ourselves kindly with curiosity and compassion, however, grants us greater access to the area of the brain involved in learning, planning, logic, and emotional regulation. To practice this, catch yourself saying things like, “I’m such an idiot,” and consciously repeat it in a compassionate way such as, “I’m a human that makes mistakes,” or “I’ll do better next time because of this.”

48. Accountability: A big reason why so many people struggle with self-compassion is the belief that it will enable bad behavior, when really this comes from compassion without action. We can show ourselves self-compassion and simultaneously hold ourselves to a higher standard. Practice this by drawing two columns separated by the word “and.” In one, write a compassionate statement about yourself, and in the other, how you’ll hold yourself accountable. E.g. “I’m a good person AND I’ll get support for my drinking.”

49. What Would a Friend Say? We’re so often our own worst critics. What we say to ourselves can be harsh, mean, or unforgiving—whereas someone who loves you might respond with understanding and grace. If you switched places with a friend, what would you say to them?

50. Savor the Small Wins: Progress isn’t always large strides. In fact, consistent small steps are often more sustainable and lasting. Take a moment to write down some small wins today. Maybe you delayed your first drink by 15 minutes. You practiced stepping outside and taking a deep breath. You bought sparkling water instead of a six-pack. You woke up and cared enough to keep trying. Each of your wins matter.

Getting More Support

Daily practices, journaling, and self-reflection are all helpful ways to create change in your relationship to alcohol—and it's also important to recognize the limitations of self-help. An outside perspective provided by a trained professional can be useful for expanding insight, challenging you to think in new ways, facilitating deeper processing, and personalized skill development.

That, and it can be uniquely healing to work with another human who understands you, doesn't judge you, and holds the hope for you until you're ready to take it yourself.

Find Alcohol Counseling

Peer-support groups can also provide a supportive structure for renewing motivation regularly, maintaining awareness of your goals, and feeling connected to other humans in the process. And if 12-Step groups like AA aren't your cup of tea, know there are many other options like SMART Recovery, Refuge Recovery, Recovery Dharma, Moderation Management, and other local groups.

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If you’re struggling with substance use, help is available. For immediate support and local resources, call SAMHSA’s National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357.

This article is written for the sole purpose of providing information on mental health topics. It is not medical or legal advice, nor a substitute for medical intervention or professional mental health counseling, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not replace or alter any treatment or care you are receiving without direct consultation from your mental health or medical providers. Any questions regarding your treatment should be brought directly to your professional and medical practitioners. If you are experiencing a medical emergency, call 911 immediately.

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